Lifestyle

The 9 most annoying people on Facebook

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Let’s face it.  Facebook has clearly made it’s mark on the world.  What started out as a mere program to keep in touch with college students has now become one of the largest forms of communication in the world.

As new programs come out, Facebook struggles to stay a leader in the social media world. You will often see words thrown around like algorithms.  In recent years we have seen Facebook evolve with new interfaces, new ad presentations, and then of course the nifty feature that allows us to only see what Facebook thinks we want to see.

With the evolution of the interface itself, comes evolution of it’s users.  And thus, things that bothered us about Facebook have changed.   Game invites are a thing of the past.

Here is the new updated list for 2019 compiled from numerous different contributors of what they find to be the most annoying things about Facebook posters.

 

9.  The Fisherman (and woman). – This user is constantly fishing for compliments.   If you are “feeling fat” today in your size 2 pants, kiss our asses.   If your perfect new haircut looks “off”, or your six pack abs “make your shirt too tight”, we don’t care.  You look great, you know you look great, do you need us to tell you also?  Your nails are perfect, so are your new shoes.  And you know it.  And we KNOW you know it.

8.  The Go Funder. – OK, listen.  We can’t always help Timmy get a new kidney or Peter a new leg, but we can share in hopes we find someone who can.   You could post 1,000 GoFundMe’s and if it’s to help someone truly in need, you will never bother a soul.  However, Josh’s Aug rent payment, or Trudy’s auto repair, not so much.  Asking for extraordinary life saving procedures, ok.   Shock and awe over the sudden death of a family member, keep ’em coming, but asking for money for your bills, begging.  We helped you raise money for Diana’s June rent, she still needs July and August too? Maybe she wants to start thinking about changing residences or jobs.  Handouts are not what GoFundMe was meant for.

7.  Ms./Mr. Mature– Facebook varies by users ages greatly.  And sometimes you just expect immaturity.  Especially when people can say whatever they want from the safety of their own homes across the world.  But, if you have to point out how mature you are, you aren’t.  You are not “too mature to get into this with you”.  If you were too mature to get into it, you wouldn’t have acknowledged publicly it to begin with.

6. Polly Pitiful- Got passed over for that big promotion again?  Boyfriend left you? Bills too high?  Yeah it’s happens to all of us at some point or another.  We are so sorry to hear it.  We were sorry to hear it a week ago.  We were sorry it was still happening a month ago……  We know you are so tired of whatever it is, trust me, we are tired of it too.

5. The bait and switcher-  “Omg, not this again!” or “I can’t do this anymore”  And when asked about it the response is ” I don’t want to talk about it on FB”.  If you didn’t want to talk about it on FB, it’s probably best not to bring it up. People who actually still care about you are worried (or nosey).  Which is exactly what you want, but without a reason why.  Just be worried about me, but “I am OK”, unconvincingly.  What that person means is, I am just waiting for the right person to reach out to me, I am posting it to get their attention.  And everyone who isn’t that person, has to leave it up to the imagination.  I imagine you are just looking for attention and ignore you.  We commented on the post looking for answers and all you gave us was a lousy cliche.

4. The un-verifier– Don’t believe everything you read.  Facebook isn’t going to start charging you if you don’t copy and paste this to your profile.  Can you believe people still don’t get that?  Why are you posting privacy notices?  Facebook is a public entity.  There is very little expectation of privacy.  FB posts are admissible in court too, regardless of what privacy notice you put on your wall.  People write blogs titled “President sleeps with donkey” with lots of ads to …sell you stuff.  Foot cream, jewelry, candy, whatever you want.  Before you blow up the internet world with the next urban legend, vet your source.

3. Mr & Ms. Perfect- It’s always nice to give a shout out to your partner for the world to see every now and then, but we are not a part of your marriage, or relationship.  We don’t need reassurance everyday you are still in love.  We don’t need to see you eating breakfast together every morning, then watching tv together every night.  Unless you tell us otherwise, we will just assume perfection all the time.  Show us your family trips, show us your date nights, show us you dressed up for Halloween, but some stuff can be a mystery.  I assure you, we will not think less of you if you miss the breakfast together selfie post a few times or all of them.  The more you reassure us, the less reassured we really are.

2. The passive-aggressive unfriender. – Facebook has a feature called “unfollow”.  It’s easy, you decide you are tired of seeing someones posts, so you hide them.  You can choose a limited time or..forever.  User’s choice.  So when Joe Politics won’t shut up about the president, boom you hit a button and never see his posts again.   Except you missed when Joe had his first baby, or bought his first house, or graduated school.  If you don’t ever want to see what someone shares, take the plunge, click delete, let go of the past and move on.  Your friendship will survive, or it won’t. Either way, you aren’t pretending anymore.

1.  The Enabler– Maybe you aren’t asking us to help pay your bills, or sharing constant trash.  Maybe you rarely post.  But the enabler is the top offender, because they feed into all of these.  The enabler can be distinguished by their comments.  Keep your head up, Josh.  Hang in there, Jack.  You deserved the promotion, Alex.  Your size 2 pants look great, Susie!  Looking good Mike!  Awe, you look so happy eating eggs, Raf.  Give me a break, Jake, stop enabling this type of behavior.  I’ve even see a preface to the privacy notice: I know this is probably not true, but just to be sure: paste notice. No, do not paste.  Delete.

 

 

 

 

 

*stock image- courtesy of Hootsuite

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